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Single File: Bed Gratitude

Life Advice / Single File /

Her phone call startled me. The distraught woman on the other end spoke in rapid-fire sentences, most of them half-finished. Every word was confused, jumbled. But after some time, it became clear that her husband of 30 years was leaving the marriage. He wanted to live alone. In a way, he had already gone; they hadn't had sex in a year, and the ...Read more

Dreamstime/Dreamstime/TNS

Ask Dating Coach Erika: 'Is it a red flag if they get sexual before we've even met?'

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

YES!!!

Probably half of the questions I get are, “Is it a red flag if (fill in the blank)?” And in many of these cases, based on whatever the “blank” is, it’s not a red flag. It’s a mere preference. For example, “It is a red flag if he has a roommate at age 32?” Probably not. “Is it a red flag if he texts his mother every day?...Read more

TNS

Ask Anna: I shut down in long-distance relationships -- how do I stay connected?

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

Dear Anna,

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for about six months, and we moved in together pretty quickly — it’s been wonderful, and I feel really loved. The challenge is he’s about to relocate for work for most of the year, and I’m scared about how I’ll handle the distance. I have a weird pattern when people aren’t physically in my ...Read more

Millennial Life: In Bro We Do Not Trust

I've spent most of my career as a freelance writer being a generalist. You don't delve too much into one subject because, really, you can find an expert on a topic who would love to rattle on with acronyms for at least a solid hour.

It's been one of the privileges of journalism to meet with people who believe in your capacity to share their ...Read more

TNS

Ask Anna: Help! My partner always skips social gatherings and I'm tired of going alone

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

Dear Anna,

I've been with my boyfriend for over six years, and I'm exhausted from constantly attending family gatherings and social events alone while he stays home playing video games. Every wedding, birthday party or holiday celebration, I'm the only one without a partner while everyone else shows up as couples. I've started making excuses ...Read more

Love -- And All That Good Stuff

Life Advice / Single File /

As long as we're on the subject of partnership in love -- aren't we always? -- and the difference it can make, this might just be the right time to look at what it is that's prodding you toward commitment. The most common reason, of course, is to banish loneliness forever. Many of us enter (and stay in) a relationship primarily to avoid being ...Read more

Dreamstime/Dreamstime/TNS

Ask Dating Coach Erika: What are my clients like?

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

I often get questions from friends and potential clients alike: “What are your clients like? How old are they? What kinds of things do they ask you?”

Let me let you in…

My client base is about 70% women and 30% men, ranging in age from mid-20s to mid-70s. But most are in their 30s, 40s and 50s. In general, I believe that women are more ...Read more

Millennial Life: When Quiet Isn't Enough

I used to believe in quiet resistance. You choose the right moments to slip wrenches into the gears without drawing the guard's attention. Movies love a covert operator like the whistleblower or the silent saboteur who knows that noise gets you caught. But we're not in the movies.

Lately, the vibes, as the kids would say, feel different. There'...Read more

Dreamstime/Dreamstime/TNS

Ask Anna: My partner won't step up--am I helping or enabling?

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

Dear Anna,

I’ve been with my boyfriend for three years, and I love him—he’s funny, supportive and kind. Right now, we’re living at my sister’s place while saving for our own apartment. He’s 29 and I’m 27. I work full-time as a freelance writer and make a comfortable living, but his part-time retail job barely covers his own ...Read more

Single File: Healthy Brainwashing for You (Part 1)

Life Advice / Single File /

Trust me. What I'm about to suggest is beneficial. Yes, it may fall into the category of auto-suggestion, but it's the healthy kind. So healthy, indeed, it may very well make you stronger and abler to bring your life in line with your deepest wishes. And isn't that what we all want? Now that we're agreed on that, let's move on to the good stuff....Read more

Hanna Ferents/Dreamstime.com/TNS

Ask Dating Coach Erika: How do I make sure I'm mastering first dates?

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

While a lot of the advice I give revolves around how to get the first date, even more important is how to nail that first date.

Let’s take a look at some tips for the all-important first date:

What not to do on a first date:

1. Be late without notice

2. Be excessively late, with or without notice

3. Have your phone out or text ...Read more

Millennial Life: None of This Is Normal

I used to use the website, the Wayback Machine, to find incriminating teenage poetry on long-lost LiveJournal accounts written by people who are now normal accountants and thought their old emo phase wasn't going to haunt them. Yesterday, I used the Wayback Machine to see a government website delete parts of the Constitution.

The chaos is real,...Read more

Dreamstime/Dreamstime/TNS

Ask Anna: My boyfriend doesn't think I'm 'hot' -- how do I deal with that?

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

Dear Anna,

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for almost a year, and for the most part, things are great — we’re even talking about moving in together. But recently, during a conversation about past relationships, he admitted he doesn’t find me physically “beautiful.” He said he thinks I’m pretty and loves my personality, intelligence ...Read more

Single File: Marrieds -- A Close-up

Life Advice / Single File /

Indulge me if you will, dear reader, and agree to take a test. (Nothing written. I promise.) Over the next few weeks, I want you to make a point of closely observing married couples -- your parents, friends, relatives -- being careful, of course, not to make them feel as if they're under a microscope. (That alone requires tact, so there may be ...Read more

Ernest Akayeu/Dreamstime/TNS

Ask Dating Coach Erika: How do I not lose hope that I'll find the right person?

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

I understand how frustrating dating can feel sometimes, especially when you feel like you’ve been putting yourself out there over and over again. Feelings of frustration are valid.

My first question is this: Are you putting yourself out there in a productive way? Are you on two dating sites? (My recommendation is two, and if that feels ...Read more

Millennial Life: There Should Be Signs

There's a joke that goes, "I wouldn't tell anyone that I won the lottery, but there would be signs." Most recently, I told a friend that I'd buy her a vintage car that could park next to my brand-new-to-me DeLorean.

My fantasy of coming into money -- maybe through the lottery, or forgotten Bitcoin, or a long-lost magical trust fund -- always ...Read more

Ask Amy: Exiting with some well-worn wisdom

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Readers: Since announcing my departure from writing this syndicated column, I have heard from scores of people across various platforms, thanking me for more than two decades of offering advice and wishing me well in my “retirement.” I am very touched and grateful for this outpouring of support.

The thing is – I don’t think of ...Read more

 

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